to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
