There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
