My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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