he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
