Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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