1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Congratulations! We have a period
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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