my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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