I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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