is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize