Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
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