Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Randomize
