look no pants
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
