Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
