i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
dude i'm inner monologue high
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
