$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
