Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just cut my nipple shaving
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
