your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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