He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
