he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
