so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
