Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize