is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
