i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
