i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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