he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
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Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
