well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
