Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
