God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
