Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
bring money and cleavage
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
