I seem to have left my pride at pride
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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