Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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