Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Randomize
