So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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