we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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