Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
The ass gains better be worth it
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