Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.

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(613): View more from Ontario

the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek

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(320): View more from Minnesota

her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her

(1-320): View more from Minnesota

that's how i am about ashleys and britneys

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(631): View more from New York

I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college

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(919): View more from North Carolina

if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust

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(519): View more from Ontario

Hey, how are you?

(1-519): View more from Ontario

No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.

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(206): View more from Washington

somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".

(206): View more from Washington

If you find out what that means, show me.

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