You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
