It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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