That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
