Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize
