We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
