oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
