hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
