so that wasnt chicken after all
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
