you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
