4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
