so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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