what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
