Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
