Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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