So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize